At Hill, we are quick to assign people to friend groups. If a group of students sit together in the dining hall, hangs out in the student center, or studies in the library multiple times, they are automatically referred to as a friend group. Personally, I belong to one of these groups. We have a huge group chat, that we first made during freshman year, and have kept adding people to over the years. As a friend group, we include anyone to sit down with us at meals, come with us to the library, and more. There is nothing wrong with friend groups; I would be a hypocrite if I said so as I technically belong to one. It’s just that we tend to refer to an individual person as an entity of the group instead of just them as an individual. If one person from a group does something that others don’t like, the whole friend group is looked upon as if they cosigned or agreed with the action. We need to start addressing individuals more, and stop addressing groups as a whole.
People are friends with others outside their friend ‘groups’. Some deem it necessary to refer to a friend group with a name. Having a set name and identity applied to everyone can sometimes be exclusionary, even if that’s not the intention. Someone whose friends with everyone in the group, but isn’t considered a group “member” can feel excluded, and left out.
Group chats are considered sacred and if someone is added to one, there sometimes has to be beforehand consideration. Having to have a conversation with someone about whether or not to add someone to a group chat that everyone is friends with is ridiculous. Unless the groupchat discusses extremely private matters or is between a small amount of people, it doesn’t make sense to exclude a friend.
I love all of my friends, and am glad I have a core group of them that always have my back. However, I have friends in different forms that hang out with different people. Students should hang out with whomever they want without worrying about being grouped. It’s time for Hill to diverge from this . We are individuals who are friends with whomever we please, and we should not feel designated to belong to a group or assign a name to a group of friends.